


The Picture of Wendy Son

by ChaseTheSun



Series: No More Love Songs [6]
Category: K-pop, Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: F/F, this is weird and i'm sorry, wenrene - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-09-19
Packaged: 2019-05-28 21:49:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15058520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChaseTheSun/pseuds/ChaseTheSun
Summary: Inspired by Irene, her telephone, and that epic picture in Peek-A-Boo





	1. The Picture of Wendy Son

Seungwan hears the doctor's words and her world collapses around her. Joohyun's hand around hers is the only thing that keeps her tethered. He says that it will be slow, and painless, and peaceful, and that she won't notice a thing. He says that she is lucky and that it could be much, much worse.

 Seungwan doesn't think she's lucky at all.

She knows they expect her to accept her fate with dignity and grace. The sick are not allowed to put their misery on display. They’re expected to be happy, they’re expected to be grateful, they’re expected to play a part. And Seungwan doesn’t it to end this way.

She doesn't want face death with a smile on her face.

She wants to rage and rage and rage, because she doesn't deserve this, Joohyun doesn't deserve this; they don't deserve to hurt like this. Because it's going to hurt and it's not going to go away, even after she's gone. Joohyun will keep on hurting and Seungwan won't be able to kiss the pain away.

Joohyun runs a thumb over their interlocked fingers. Her grip is tight and her fingers are strong and she knows that Joohyun will not let her go. Seungwan knows that she will fight anything and anybody that tries to tear them apart.

But this is Seungwan's fight and she knows that she cannot win. When their rings glimmer in the afternoon sun she remembers vows, white dresses and a twirling dance; it reminds her of a promise she won't be able to keep.

≈

Seungwan hates it. She hates the finality, she hates the false pleasantries, the pity, the sympathy that she is sure to receive. She hates leaving Joohyun behind this way.

She doesn't want to make the necessary calls; it feels too much like giving up. But she does. She digs out a little leather-bound journal from where it’s hidden. It's been bundled up in an old shirt Seungwan never had the heart to throw away.

It's old and moth-bitten and her fingers tremble when they meet the fabric. The tears come when she is alone in their room, holding the shirt that she wore on their first date. Seungwan cries for her time cut short, she cries for the life she could have led, she cries for the life they wanted to share.

When no more tears will come and her hands stop shaking, she makes the calls and she writes her letters. She knows that if she doesn't, Joohyun will have to do it. And Seungwan cannot stop the hurt, but she can lessen it.

 She will be strong, for the both of them.

≈

Seungwan knows they are running out of time. Her guitar hangs untouched and gathering dust, the strings are as shiny as the day she bought re-stringed them. Her fingers are too weak and her skin is too frail; the strings dig in gently and still Seungwan bleeds.

She hasn't worked for months and Joohyun hasn't either. She wonders how they're going to making it through. The nights are colder and the bills are longer and her time less and less. Their savings are growing slim and it was never fat to begin with.

It's difficult and it's tiring, but it's alright as long as she has Joohyun. And then Joohyun makes a suggestion that leaves her reeling. _Trust me Seungwan, it’ll be better for us. You’ll be happier there._ Her smile is hopeful and her eyes are bright and Seungwan can’t bring herself to say no.

≈

They move into an old mansion by the sea. One with wrought iron gates and tangled gardens and too many rooms to count. Joohyun says that it's been in her family for generations and that the salt-tinged air will be good for her.

Seungwan knows she doesn't like to talk about her family. She met them only once — on the day of their wedding. Joohyun's father had walked her down the aisle with tears in his eyes and a silver-topped cane in his hands. He and his wife had taken her aside and thanked her for making Joohyun happy and for binding their lives together. They seemed to be a lovely couple and she doesn't understand why they never visit. It is Joohyun's decision to make and Seungwan will not pry.

Portraits line every wall, in all the hallways and all the rooms; the mansion is a gallery of landscapes and still-lifes, painted rooms within rooms. Joohyun's family are artists and she is not surprised. She sees no portraits of people and when she asks why, Joohyun replies that they will always be a pale imitation: lacking soul and beauty and everything that colours life.

 Joohyun leads her to the west wing, where their room is on the highest floor. It has a door that opens to a balcony where the sea rages and froths. The room contains no pictures. The walls are eggshell white and the bed is covered in lilac sheets.

They fill the wardrobe and the drawers and all the empty spaces and Seungwan hangs her guitar on the wall. It's new and foreign and different, but she will adjust.

Home is where the heart is and hers is with Joohyun.

≈

Joohyun tells her that the east wing is under repair and too dangerous to enter, but she is free to explore the entirety of the west wing. She tells her that there is a room with a piano and stained glass windows, that when the sun is in the right place everything is painted in rainbow hues; that there is a library with books old and rare, with shelves from ceiling to floor; that there is a room with a thousand butterflies, beautiful to behold and with lives cut short.

Joohyun says there’s dozens of rooms filled with wonderous delights and that it’s all theirs.

She takes Seungwan to a sprawling city by the sea where they walk through cobbled streets hand in hand. The people are friendly and the sun is bright. Joohyun says that she grew up here, where it smells of salt and sand, and that she hasn’t forgotten a single face.

Joohyun leads her to a fountain guarded by lions of stone. She takes out a coin. _Let’s make a bet. Heads, you take my hand and never let go. Tails, you—_

Seungwan surprises her a kiss and pries the coin from limp fingers. She tosses it into the fountain and brushes away Joohyun’s protests. She says that Joohyun can’t buy her with a coin. And that the only payment she’ll accept is a lifetime of kisses.

They have dinner on a pier with waves lapping at their feet. The sun is setting and the ocean is painted red and gold. Joohyun wraps an arm around her and Seungwan leans into her warmth.

The wind smells of brine and caresses her face. The ocean is before them, immense and terrifying, and she does not feel fear because she is safe in Joohyun’s arms. She falls asleep to the rhythm of a familiar heartbeat and the sounds of the sea.

≈

They spend their days together in that mansion by the sea. Seungwan thinks that something is strange, but she doesn’t know exactly what. She brushes it off as a figment of her imagination. She tells herself it is because she is in an unfamiliar place, far removed from what she used to know. It’s decadent: the rich carpets, the dark woods, the wealth that oozes out of every brick and stitch.

Joohyun takes her to the garden. It’s a lush expanse expanse of green with roses of every colour and a swing of vines. Seungwan laughs when she is pushed and it rings through the garden. When they've both had their fun and her legs grow weak, they lie on the grass and Joohyun shows her how to make flower crowns, her fingers deft and sure. Seungwan is crowned with thirteen red roses and a burning kiss.

The sun sets and they part ways. Joohyun heads to the library and she retires to the bathroom. All marble and glass painstakingly cut into gentle curves, it is pleasing to the eye and calming to the senses. The water is heaven against her skin and Seungwan reclines in the tub with her arms draped over the edge.

There are no mirrors in the room and she wonders why.

 She forgets all about it when the itch in her lungs starts. She coughs and her hands come away red. She isn’t where she used to be, but the pain is still present and the sickness has not left. Her new surroundings are a distraction and she almost forgets.

She’s in a new, pretty place and still she waits for death.

Joohyun can steal her away from everything Seungwan has ever known with a smile. Joohyun can steal her breath away with a kiss. But Joohyun cannot steal her pain away, no matter how hard she tries.

≈

They sit on the balcony. Seungwan cradles Joohyun in her arms as they watch the sea. The moon is high and bright and the waves sweep silver. Joohyun smiles. The stars cannot compare and the moon weeps in envy. She memorizes Joohyun’s features carefully, takes in the beauty of her face. She presses a kiss against parted lips and prays that she won’t forget. _Please just let me have this._

≈

Seungwan grips the railing, knuckles paper white. She breathes quick and shallow and even then her lungs will not work. Every step she takes pains her and every breath burns.

She kneels on the lowest step and stares up. There is no end in sight. The stairs have never been so daunting, never been so difficult and in that moment, Seungwan knows.

≈

She sleeps longer and longer and when she wakes the day is halfway gone. Everything starts to blur. Colours are no longer colours and shapes are no longer shapes.

The lines on Joohyun’s face grow deeper and darker and her eyes gain an almost manic gleam. She spends the night after night whispering promises of forever with her fingers in Seungwan’s hair.

≈

Today Seungwan wakes with the dawn. She slips into Joohyun’s shirt and makes her way into the garden. It’s green and blue and red and white and her soul sighs in relief. She lays back on the grass and tries to reach for the rising sun.

Joohyun finds her hours later, when the sun starts to dip beneath the horizon and Seungwan’s arms have long since lost their strength. Joohyun takes her into her arms and carries her up. They get higher and higher and Seungwan’s eyes grow heavier and heavier.

The last thing she hears is the familiar rhythm of Joohyun’s heart.

≈

It’s cold and relentless and she is all alone. Seungwan wakes screaming. She blinks once, blinks twice and then she is in Joohyun’s arms. She is warm and she is safe and Joohyun is here.

She asks what’s wrong and Seungwan does not know how to answer. She buries her face into Joohyun’s next and let gentle humming lull her to sleep. _I’ll always be here for you. Nothing is going to tear us apart. Nothing._

She doesn’t notice the victory in Joohyun’s eyes, the satisfied curl of her lip; don’t notice the way her fingers shake and the quiet way she gasps for breath.

≈

Seungwan wakes up and she knows, she just knows that something is different. There’s no catch in her throat, no numbness in her arms. The tangled of thorns that had been slowly festering inside of her has vanished completely.

She feels perfectly fine.

≈

Joohyun takes her to the beach. The sand is gleaming white and pristine, the sea an endless rolling blue. Seungwan stretches out on her towel and luxuriates in the feel of the sun against her skin. There's not a single person in sight and she basks in their solitude.

Slender fingers rub scented oil over her back and she sighs in contentment. Soft lips press kisses down her spine and she can’t help the giggles that spill out. Seungwan wishes that she could stay like this forever. With Joohyun and the sea.

≈

Seungwan takes the stairs two at a time and makes it up to their room with breath to spare. She forms countless chords and her fingers do not blood. Joohyun smiles her secret smile and presses a kiss to flushed cheeks. Seungwan is content to spend an eternity with Joohyun, where like this they remain.

≈

This is paradise and it is theirs. Joohyun will let nothing stand in their way.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

Joohyun hears the doctor's words and the first thing she feels is fear. When its serpentine coils settle in her stomach, she tightens her hold on Seungwan's hand, determined to not let go. They can get through this, she knows they can. Seungwan is strong and she is smart and together they can make it through anything.

The doctor says that Seungwan is lucky and she hates him for it.

She leads Seungwan home. Her fingers are too limp and her wrists are too thin and Joohyun should have noticed. She should have seen the signs and put the pieces together. She blames herself. If they had known earlier, if they just had a little more time, things could have been different.

And now it's too late.

Their rings meet with a gentle clink and Joohyun remembers going to a hundred shops to find the perfect one, remembers slipping it onto a pale finger, remembers the promise of a lifetime.

Joohyun knows that she will never love someone the way she loves Seungwan. There's a piece of her that she gave away and it's one that she's never going to get back. She knows that If she asks, Seungwan would give. But she never will.

That part of her belongs with Seungwan and she wants it to be kept.

They arrive home and she presses a kiss to a pale forehead before heading out. She returns with all the ingredients for Seungwan's favourite meal. Seungwan flitters about while Joohyun cooks, it feels like home and she wants it to stay this way.

And that’s when it comes to her.

≈

Late at night, when Seungwan's tucked into their bed, Joohyun strokes at gossamer strands and watches moonlight dance across a sleeping face. They could be happy, she thinks, they could stay like this forever, just the two of them. Joohyun whispers her promises into the silent night and begins to plan.

She calls her father and asks him to prepare the house.

She is desperate and she knows it. But there is a strand of hope. It is thin and is it frayed, but it exists and Joohyun isn’t going to let it go.

Spider silk is delicate with a deceptive strength. But if she’s patient enough, if she’s persistent enough, Joohyun can stop the world from spinning on.

≈

As far back as she can remember, her father taught her the basics of painting and her mother cultivated a love of beauty. There are certain… things that cannot be allowed to leave the family and she is their only child.They swear her silence to their blood.

Joohyun paints animals, landscapes, portraits of people. She masters the shapes and colours and her work gradually breathtaking. Her parents' smiles are proud and they teach more and more family techniques as she grows.

One day, in a hidden room of rough-hewn strong they tell her something far too soon. And she flees, she flees from home, the city by the sea, and everything she has ever known.

Even after leaving, she paints twice a week; her parents’ teachings never straying far from her mind. Joohyun does not paint portraints. Not anymore.

≈

With each passing day Seungwan gets weaker and Seungwan gets frailer. And Joohyun's desperation grows. There is no more music, no more laughter, no more stars dancing in pretty eyes. She can't stand to see Seungwan so unhappy, can’t bear to watch her wilt away.

When her father calls and tell her that everything is ready, she sighs in relief. Her family had asked her questions and she had told them no lies. She asks Seungwan to come away with her, knowing that she will not refuse.

And so Joohyun returns to a place she swore never to step foot in again. A place that she never thought she would willingly go back to. Especially not with Seungwan.

Dark secrets lurk within the house and they will never leave. It has been that way since it was built and it will stay that way until it’s nothing but ash and rubble.

But Joohyun knows she has no choice. Their time is running out and there’s only this.

This is the only way they can be happy together.

≈

They arrive when the sun shyly peeks over the horizon. The house appears almost welcoming, cast in the light of the morning.

Joohyun chooses a room in the west wing that faces the sea and sunset. It’s well-furnished, without any pictures, and it feels more like home than it ever did before, and she knows it is because Seungwan is here with her.

She gives Seungwan free rein of the entire west wing. There’s a thousand curiosities to enchant her and Joohyun knows that she will be charmed. She drags Seungwan to the library first. As long as Seungwan knows there’s a library here, she won’t suspect there’s another in the east wing.

Houses do not usually have two libraries, after all.

The east wing is dangerous. The east wing houses far too many secrets and Joohyun tells Seungwan it’s under repair, lest she go exploring and stumble on inconvenient truths.

≈

When Seungwan is sleeping and the house is silent, Joohyun creeps away into the dark.

Portraits of her ancestors line the walls and when she nods her head politely, they nod back. The hall ends at a wall with a picture of a bookshelf that stretches from floor to ceiling, so detailed one can name every single painted volume.

Joohyun places her palm against the canvas. She steps forward when she feels the solid surface beneath her palms disappear and her fingers glide through the air like it’s water. Joohyun ends up in the dark, right in front of a bookshelf exactly like the one in the painting. She heads to the centre of the library. There’s a picture of a mirror hanging above the fireplace.

Her father appears in the mirror at exactly midnight. He tells her what books to consult and where to find them. He says that the materials have been prepared and the room is ready.

And that all she needs is a substitute.

He says that she is talented, but this is dangerous and that if she has any hesitation, he can come to the house and take care of it all.

Joohyun replies that she will be fine.

This library will be their salvation. It’s been carefully cultivated and guarded, generation after generation, and she thanks all her ancestors for enabling her to do this.

It's these books, dark and forbidden, that she delves into when Seungwan sleeps. Night after night, she learns things that she shouldn't know. She does things that she shouldn’t do. Terrible, depraved things that she will make sure never see the light of day.

Because she knows how much Seungwan loves her.

And she knows it’s not enough.

≈

Joohyun takes Seungwan to the city by the sea.

Its occupants are welcoming and the city is beautiful. She can tell that Seungwan is eager to explore. She tells Seungwan it’s a city of lovers and a city of dreams. Love never dies here.

The people have been here for generations. She remembers every face from her childhood. They haven’t changed a bit; they haven’t aged a day.

When Seungwan is distracted, she heads to the bulletin board. She leaves a note asking for volunteers.

Joohyun understands that life is precious. Now more than ever.

The townspeople know what signed up for. They have either paid their dues or are prepared to. They owe her family everything and Joohyun knows what they will never forget.

She needs a substitute.

 ≈

They spend their days together in their mansion by the sea. Seungwan’s cheeks grow gaunt and lose their colour. Seungwan’s blood rusts on marble and glass.

And Joohyun’s desperation grows.

≈

There’s a letter wedged in the gate and Joohyun hides it away before Seungwan can notice.

≈

It’s a moonless night when Joohyun lurks behind the gates with a hooded robe and a flickering torch. She does not flinch when silent figures step out of the shadows and into her light.

She leads them through the gate and the garden, and she does not look back.

She leads them through the cellar and its false wall, and she does not look back.

There is a room of rough-hewn stone with sconces lining the wall, holding torches that do not burn. The altar is obsidian. Old as Pompeii and just as deadly, its inky blackness swallows the light her torch casts.

She flicks her head sharply and the figures move.

Joohyun’s arms shake when she raises the blade and paints the void red.

≈

Joohyun had told Seungwan that pictures of people will always be a pale imitation: lacking soul and beauty and everything that colours life. Life is impossible to imitate. However, it can be borrowed; can be taken.

≈

Blood, bones, skin.

Joohyun takes life to give life. And no matter how gifted the artist, the medium still matters more.

She starts Seungwan’s picture wearing the scent of iron like a cloak.

≈

 

Seungwan sleeps until the sun reaches its highest point. Seungwan’s eyes lose their shine. There’s a lethargy in her limbs and a sadness in her smile.

Joohyun spends her days watching Seungwan and her nights painting what she sees. We will be happy, you and I.

She cannot go any faster. Not with the materials she has.

≈

Half the bed is empty when Joohyun wakes. She finds Seungwan when the stars begin to take their place and the world is quiet.

Seungwan is serene in the moonlight and looks as if she could be sleeping.

Joohyun knows better.

≈

She needs a substitute. And this time she does not ask.

Joohyun knows the more she takes, the more she can give.

≈

The void runs red. Again and again. And iron begins to seep into her soul.

≈

Seungwan’s eyes snap open.


End file.
